Thanks, mom!

I love the beginning of every new season of American Idol. It makes me want to thank my mother for always telling us kids that we could be whatever we wanted,* except singers, since no one in my family can sing. Oh yeah, and once we found out that I was bad at math, I think she said that maybe astronaut was out of the picture (and mathematician). Sometimes I feel bad for these people, but not like bad enough to stop watching or to avoid laughing. I am not as horrified by the people who can't sing as those who tell them that they can. Why would you do that to your kid or your friend? Why tell them they're good when it's clear that they're not? I mean, I think Britney Spears has shown us the magic of digital, but the people who suck on American Idol aren't as hot as Brit was like 10 years ago.

Shout out to my sister for running her first marathon! And to Ellen for running the half! The pride I feel is like what I felt when took the stairs leaving work the other day. Big milestones all around.

And to every asshat who thinks a super-loud car is awesome, you're a douchebag. If you drive a Geo or a Sentra or a Kia, you're a double-douchebag.

*I was having a conversation with my mom back when I waited tables and I mentioned the good money that a friend of mine made cocktailing at a strip club (one of the "nice" ones). I joked about working in a strip club. Clearly not connecting the waiting tables part of the conversation with the strip club part, my ever-supportive mother said, "Honey, I'm sure you'd be good at the dancing [she clearly has never seen me dance], but aren't you a little small on top?" Now that's love. Pure love.